Bullies

I don’t like bullies!  I don’t like parents of bullies because they made their little bullies, either by allowance, or by example. That’s not some blind judgement I’m making – it’s been my actual experience, and unfortunately, I have a lot of experience.

Josh was an awkward kid, and had social difficulties growing up.  He’s was also extremely intelligent, rigid in his way of thinking, and reactionary. I get it, he was the kid in class that was different, and he was an easy target for the school bullies. But just because I know that, does not mean I’m okay with it.

I have two grandkids now.  They’re toddlers, and so they’re learning manners, respect, patience (ha-ha!), how to treat animals, and that they themselves are participants in the functioning of the family. Being mean just to be mean is not acceptable. Speaking their mind, is.  They learn by watching our interactions and the way we communicate. And they shine a light on our behavior by mimicking us, in public, for everyone to see. We know that when they say “s**t” or “f**k” it’s because we do. So, we stopped saying it. Well, most of us did…Nana says what she wants!

My point is this; bullies have learned that it’s okay to treat people however they want, and what they want is to humiliate, taunt, belittle, and sometimes cause physical harm to someone that is not likely to give it back in kind.  We all know that bullies are small, limp, and insecure. I’m saying that their parents are small, limp, and insecure too.

Bullies have their own set of issues to deal with. I get that. Whether they are a child or adult, they push their angst onto others because they don’t know how or can’t find their balance in this world.

I know better than to hate. I understand that we are all connected, and that people come into our lives for a purpose. Even the people we don’t like or understand. Even the people that cause us great anguish. I know better.  Because I know better, my kids know better, and because they know better, my grandkids will know better.

I hope Josh’s bullies grew up and found their balance. I hope they finally know better.

Listen to the Podcast: Being Bullied