Watching my Autistic son start dating was weird. It was and still is a strange dynamic because it means he’s doing this grown up thing, while still needing prompting and redirecting in most other areas of his life. He’s calling someone “hun” and at the same time still needs reminders to brush his teeth. It makes my head explode.
Josh can be very rigid in his way of thinking, and that carries into his dating life. The first time he ever went on a date, he asked her to marry him. She had Autism as well, and he has told me that in great part that’s what drew him to her. So, they were engaged, and because that became the arrangement, he couldn’t see it any other way. Even when it was clear that it wasn’t a good match he couldn’t shift his perception because in his mind it was set in stone. It did end, and years later, he’s met someone he thinks he would like to date. Nice.
I’m used to picking up the pieces. I think that’s what most moms do. Because Josh has Autism, picking up the pieces takes up a lot of my time. Organizing, arranging, guiding, teaching…they are all still a part of being Josh’s mom. I’m trying to figure out how to have all those responsibilities and watch him date. They don’t seem to go together. It’s like that kid’s game of which one of these is different than the rest!
I want Josh to be happy. I would love for him to find someone to be happy with. I would be very happy I think doing that empty nest thing. Then I could go on lots of dates with my husband. Now, that’s really nice!!
Listen to the Podcast: JHA026: Dating – Part One | http://www.sonyaking.com/jha026-dating
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